CHAPTER 44
Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to JKR. All situations are mine. No $$$ is being made from this fanfic.
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Chapter 44 ~ Honesty
Harry returned home to find Ginny in the kitchen, drinking tea and chatting with Dobby. She looked up at the wizard as he walked in, kissed her on the forehead and sat down across from her.
Dobby took one look at the wizard and exited the kitchen. Ginny studied him. He looked upset.
“Are you all right Harry? Where did you go?” Ginny asked him.
Harry adjusted his glasses.
“I went to talk to Hermione, Ginny. I’m not going to see her for a while,” the wizard said. “I think it’s better if I don’t.”
Ginny looked at him over her tea. Hermione and Harry had been friends practically forever.
“I see,” she said shortly. “Because of me?”
“Well, you’re part of it…yes. But Hermione needs to realize she doesn’t control the world. She’s there fucking Snape to get his support and have him take care of her, and has the nerve to judge you,” he said bitterly.
Ginny studied him a moment, then said softly, “But Harry…the only reason she accepted the Professor’s patronage in the first place was because she wanted to find a way to save you. She didn’t do it for herself, Harry. She did it for you. She made that sacrifice to try and bring you back…and she did.”
Harry looked at Ginny as if she’d hit him with a rock cake. He had been so angry with the witch, he had forgotten all about that. The only reason she was fucking Snape was because she had wanted to save him so desperately. She had done it, but now was stuck in the patronage until she met all the requirements.
“Oh Hermione. You crazy witch. You’d probably give up your life for me if you could,” Harry thought to himself miserably. He felt the same about Hermione. He looked at Ginny with pain in his eyes.
”Ginny…why do things have to be so complicated?” he asked the red-haired witch as if she had the answers he needed.
“I think the gods purposely made life that way to keep themselves entertained,” Ginny replied, giving the wizard a small smile. “But Harry, I’ve had a bit of time to think about what Hermione said. Actually, since you’ve been back, I’ve had the opportunity to think about a lot of things…things I couldn’t face before. Things about myself. Hermione said what she said because she felt I abandoned you and was trying to protect you, maybe thinking I will abandon you again. She might also be angry because you turned to me and not to her when you recovered. Maybe even…even a little jealous. I think if I were in her shoes, I might feel the same way,” Ginny said quietly. “She loves you, Harry. You are like her brother, her family. It might not be the kind of romantic love shared between a man and woman, but it’s just as strong.”
“Well, she needs to accept my decisions,” Harry said angrily. “She almost drove you off.”
Ginny looked at Harry soberly.
“Harry, if I were to leave…it wouldn’t be because of Hermione. I might have used what she said as an excuse, but the choice to stay or go lies with me and not anyone else. I wanted to leave, but it is because I really don’t feel good enough to be with you the way you want, Harry, not because of Hermione. The worst part is, if I had left…you would have blamed her when it wouldn’t have been her fault,” Ginny said.
Harry stared at Ginny, his heart aching. She really wanted to leave him?
“You want to leave me?” he asked her plaintively, his green eyes glistening. “But I love you, Ginny.”
“I’m not the same witch you fell in love with at Hogwarts, Harry. I was pure then, innocent. Your first love. Your first intimate relationship. But the truth is Harry, I’ve changed so much. I’ve never loved anyone but you…but I’ve changed. I’ve done things and seen things that make me a much different woman than the girl you knew,” she said softly.
Ginny’s own eyes started to glisten.
“Harry, you love a witch that no longer exists. It’s…I hate to say this, but an adolescent love at best…a first love. You haven’t even been with anyone else you can compare me to,” she said.
“But you love me, Ginny,” he said, his voice cracking.
Ginny reached across the table and took Harry’s hand.
“Yes, I do love you Harry. I’ve always loved you and will always have a place in my heart for you. But don’t you see…Hermione is right. A real love between us wouldn’t have space for someone else. Not Gail…not anyone. You see how readily you accepted Gail into our bedroom, Harry? The idea excited you…and you know why that is? You are ready to experiment, to try other women, but you didn’t know how to do that without risking hurting me. You are a romantic, Harry. A very sweet romantic who needs to get out into the world and meet other witches.”
“But…but Ginny!” he said tears beginning to spill from his eyes.
“Harry…I’m not going anywhere. I didn’t mean I was going to leave you in that way. I like being with you. I just think we need to make our relationship less intense…more adult. We can still be together when we want to be. But Hermione is right. I’m not the kind of witch to settle down. Not now. But I am the kind of witch who will always be here if you need me until you find the right one. Can’t that be enough, Harry?” Ginny asked him, her brown eyes searching his face.
Harry looked at her, then lifted his glasses and wiped at his eyes. He lowered them.
“I…I don’t know, Ginny. For me, it’s only you,” the wizard said.
“And Gail,” she added with a smirk.
“Yes, and sometimes Gail,” he admitted.
“I’ve watched you with her, Harry. You like having sex with her as much as I do, if not more. And it’s okay. But that’s even more proof that you aren’t ready for a serious love relationship any more than I am. Like I said, we need to ease off of that aspect and just…just enjoy each other and our lives. Doesn’t that make sense?” Ginny asked him.
Harry scowled.
“But that means you’ll be with other wizards. I don’t like that Ginny,” he said.
“That’s just the testosterone…the male caveman gene, Harry. Your territorial instincts. No matter who I’m with when I’m away from you, when I’m with you…it will be us. Remember, you’ll be meeting other witches too,” she said.
“I still don’t like it,” Harry said, frowning.
Ginny leaned over, lifted the wizard’s hand and kissed the back of it.
“We’ll work on it,” Ginny said, “Right now, you are the only wizard I am interested in…so no worries. I will let you know if that changes. Then we’ll deal with it.”
Harry looked at Ginny, a little ache in his heart. This wasn’t the way he wanted things to go. He wanted to live happily ever after…but Ginny had just made it very clear this was the real world, not a fairytale existence. She was no longer the innocent witch he deflowered under the stars on the grounds of Hogwarts. He was no longer the young wizard destined to destroy the greatest menace of the wizarding world. They were just two people who found each other again. He guessed he could be happy with that. Ginny would still be in his life, and in his bed. He wouldn’t be alone. Then…there was the added bonus of Gail.
Harry liked watching Ginny with the brunette witch. They were something to see. He looked over Ginny. Hell, he might even like watching her with another wizard, she was so beautiful to him. He looked at Ginny.
“I’m going to need to talk to Hermione again, aren’t I?” he asked the witch.
“I would think so. Not everyone is lucky enough to have a friend that loves him so much she’s willing to fuck someone as cold and cruel as Professor Snape to try and save him. No matter how prudish she is,” Ginny replied, smiling at him.
“All right. I just need to give her a little time. She was hurting when I left,” he said, thinking about Hermione standing in the doorway of Snape’s house. “I don’t know how I’m going to do this. I was so….” he began.
”Just be honest, Harry. Hermione is your friend. She’ll understand,” the witch said trying to comfort him.
“I just hope she will be more understanding than I was,” Harry sighed.
Gods, what a mess.
Coming to a new understanding of where they stood had been quite emotional, and Ginny needed to work off the remnants of their discussion. Harry looked like he could use a bit of comfort himself. She gave him one of her “Looks.”
“You look like you could use a bit of stress relief,” she said, standing up and giving Harry that special little smile she used when she wanted a tumble. The wizard didn’t miss it.
Harry rolled his neck and shoulders exaggeratedly. A little pained look flashed across his face, also exaggerated.
“Yeah, I feel a little tight,” he said, standing up also.
Ginny grinned wickedly.
“That’s something we’ve both got in common,” she said, waggling her eyebrows at him.
“I’ll say,” Harry replied, his green eyes going hot. “Last one to the bedroom is on the bottom!”
Harry bolted past Ginny, who shrieked “Cheater!”and raced after him.
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Hermione was on her fifth glass of wine and giggling insanely at the way Severus was looking at her.
“You always look so ‘pinched’ Severus,” she laughed, “As if you’ve been constipated for weeks!”
Hermione laughed hysterically as Severus arched an eyebrow at her.
She certainly wasn’t helping him to maintain his resolve for the “gentle” approach tonight.
“So I looked ‘pinched’ do I witch?” he asked her, giving her more shovel to dig a hole with.
“Well, not all the time. When you’re fucking me you look much different. Too bad you can’t fuck me all the time. That would take care of the ‘pinched’ look,” the witch observed, sitting up a bit straighter in the armchair.
“Would it now?” Severus asked her, standing up, picking up the significantly lower bottle of wine and putting it away.
“Hey!” Hermione protested. “I wasn’t done with that!”
Severus walked back over to Hermione and stood over her, looking down at her.
“I assure you, you are finished, witch,” he said silkily. He held out his hand.
Hermione looked at it cross-eyed for a moment, then took it. Severus pulled her up out of the chair and began walking down the hall with her.
“Where are we going?” Hermione asked him.
“To take care of my ‘pinched’ look,” the Potions Master replied, pushing her into his bedroom. She squealed and stumbled a little, then spun, looking at him accusingly.
“You pushed me!” she spat as Severus closed and warded the door. He turned and looked at the witch coolly. Her face was flushed and her hair was a bit wild. He slowly walked up to her.
“You say that as if it’s something new,” he purred at the witch, standing inches from her.
“Well, I just wanted to let you know I don’t appreciate it. I’m a lady,” Hermione said, lifting her chin slightly. “I expect you to treat me like one.”
Severus snorted.
“That was no lady in my bed a little more than a month ago,” he replied. “A few terms that aptly describe what you are, witch, are as follows: Succubus. Hellcat. Maenid. Wild Woman. None of which, I might add, will be in my bed tonight.”
Hermione stared up at him, dimly understanding what he meant.
“And as far as treating you like a lady, Hermione, you normally don’t give me the option to do that,” he said, lifting her chin…his dark eyes beginning to show some heat, “but tonight I will treat you like a woman, if not a ‘lady.’
“No hard fucking?” she asked him.
“I think it would be best put as ‘no brutalizing,’” the wizard responded, his eyes softening.
“Now come here, witch. Let’s see what we can do about my ‘pinched’ look,” he said. Suddenly he lifted Hermione and locked his mouth to hers in a very slow, deep kiss, the witch gasping in surprise as the wizard’s tongue snaked into her mouth, scouring it lazily. Severus walked with her until they were up against the wall and deepened the kiss.
Hermione felt fire flow from where their lips connected, covering her body in a sweet, aching blaze as Severus rolled his tongue sensuously in her mouth and pressed against her body gently, moving just enough to stimulate her. Hermione’s eyes closed as she surrendered to his kiss. He was gentle, but good. It felt very intimate, kissing him this way. Still, there was a definitely ache growing between her legs. It was a slow, building burn, a kind of yearning, rather than a demanding throb. She sighed into his mouth and the wizard broke the kiss, his black eyes searching her face.
“You enjoyed that,” he said to the witch.
“Mmmm,” was Hermione’s only reply as her delicious responses to the wizard’s proximity washed over her.
“More,” Hermione breathed. The glow of the wine was fast becoming the glow of the Potions Master.
Severus obliged her, this time leaning down to claim her mouth as he pulled her t-shirt gently out of her jeans, then caressed her sides, and back, his kiss still gentle but passionate. He could savor the taste of her this way, her mouth fruity from the wine, hot and wet.
He moved to her throat, his lips running up as the witch cocked her head to the side to give him better access. Severus stopped next to her ear.
“You are jealous that Ginny has a wizard who loves her, Hermione?” he asked the witch.
This question made the witch let out a sob. Why did he ask her that now, now when he was kissing her and touching her…but not loving her?
“Yes, Severus,” she replied in a whisper, “And I’m ashamed of it.”
“Don’t worry witch,” Severus said, his silken voice a bit raw, “Tonight…you will feel loved.”
Hermione began to cry in earnest as Severus moved back to her throat, then captured her lips between his own, tasting the salt of her tears.
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A/N: :::melting in a puddle at Severus’ last comment::: ok ok. Ginny found the strength to be honest with Harry, who is going to probably have to do some serious groveling with Hermione. His situation is still pretty good as far as Ginny goes. She’ll still be with him, as will Gail until he stretches his wings at least. Well, lemons on the way. Please review.