Becoming Familiar with a Man of Misery

Chapter 19 ~ Opening Up

About two hours later, Hermione heard someone at the door and sat up. Peter Pettigrew opened the door and looked at her rather hungrily. He remembered Hermione, but she had been only a child when he last saw her. He had been hiding out as Ronald Weasley’s pet rat Scabbers, been discovered by Sirius Black, and almost taken to the dementors. Luckily, he had escaped. The witch had certainly filled out well. He leveled his piggish eyes at her.

“The Dark Lord wishes to see you,” he said, opening the door wider.

Hermione swallowed, then stood up and walked past Peter and into the hall.

“Follow me,” he said, walking down the hallway. The witch followed him as he opened a door that led out into a large circular room. A throne sat in the middle of the room, but Hermione couldn’t see who was seated in it because they were behind it. Hermione pushed all knowledge of Severus dual role as a spy and their last conversation behind her mental walls, invoking the power of occulmency. She left all else as it was.

Peter led her around the throne, and stopped in front of it.

Hermione looked up into the frightening countenance of the Dark Lord. He was very thin and hairless. His skin was flesh colored, but covered in tiny scales. He had no eyebrows and his nose was nothing more than two slits. He looked lipless, and his eyes were red as fire. His fingers were very long, and his hands, elegant. He held a wand in one hand, resting against the arm of the throne. He looked down on her imperiously for a moment, then his red eyes shifted to Peter.

“You may go, Peter. I wish to talk to the witch alone,” he said to his most trusted servant.

Peter bowed.

“Yes my Lord,” he said, taking one more look at Hermione then exiting the throne room. He was hoping to listen in on their conversation.

The Dark Lord looked at Hermione. She was a small witch but quite lovely and curvaceous. He flicked his wand, and a comfortable upholstered chair appeared next to the witch.

“Sit down,” he commanded. Hermione obeyed.

“How did you come to be here?” he asked her.

“I found Severus in his rooms in bad shape and was tending him, when you summoned him. I saw the mark. When he went to disapparate, I grabbed him and was taken with him. He had no idea I was going to do that,” she said. She said she was tending him because she did not want the Dark Lord to know that Severus had people helping him, people who knew he was a deatheater.

“Why were you in his rooms?” the Dark Lord asked.

“I assist different Professors at Hogwarts with their classes to earn credits toward my degree. The Professor went missing and we needed his lesson plan, and when I couldn’t find it in the classroom, I went to his rooms to see if he had taken it there to work on, and found him,” she lied.

Hermione imagined herself doing what she described so it would be in her mind if the Dark Lord looked for it. Thoughts could be manipulated, and a Legilimens, tricked.

Voldemort looked at her, tapping his wand on the side of his throne.

“What do you think about him, now that you know he serves me?” the Dark Lord asked.

“I’m not sure what I think. He must have his reasons, but I’m not thrilled about it,” she said.

Voldemort looked at the witch consideringly. She was quite honest…not realizing that even this admittance could be grounds for her death. Not thrilled? Definitely a Cruciatus-worthy reply. But the Dark Lord withheld his wand.

“Didn’t you realize that by following him, your life could be made forfeit?” the Dark Lord asked her.

“I wasn’t thinking about that. I was only thinking I wanted to help him,” she replied honestly.

Voldemort could feel love radiating from the witch. It was a most unpleasant feeling for him. He shunned love. Yet he didn’t feel that love from the Potions Master. It seems the relationship between the two was rather one-sided.

“I see,” Voldemort said, his eyes narrowing.

He looked into the witch’s mind and saw the fighting, arguing and general aura of dislike that passed between the witch and his servant. He also saw a slew of creative retaliations by the witch against both Severus and his familiar; and how she dropped Severus with a knee to the groin. This impressed him. Severus was a formidable fighter. The fact that the witch had managed to injure him was very impressive indeed. The Dark Lord also saw she loved a wizard that obviously didn’t love her back. Another fool for love.

“Are you involved with Severus? Has he fucked you?” the Dark Lord asked her.

Hermione colored at the directness of the question.

“No,” she said honestly, “on both counts.”

She couldn’t say she was actually involved with the Potions Master.

“But he claims you are promised to him,” Voldemort said, “Is this true?”

“Yes, it is. I have been saving myself for him,” she said quietly.

Voldemort cocked his head at her.

“But he doesn’t love you. From what I’ve seen in your thoughts, he treats you horribly. Yet you still save yourself for him?” the Dark Lord asked in amazement.

“Yes,” Hermione said, coloring. Hearing the truth of her situation from another made it all sound so foolish, “I can’t help it. I love him.”

Voldemort’s mouth quirked as he fought not to laugh in the witch’s face. Most likely Severus would use her and discard her. Then most likely she would blame herself for not being able to keep him. Such blind idiotic loyalty. The kind he liked to see among his ranks directed at him

He gave the witch a small thin smile that quickly faded.

“You would have made an excellent deatheater,” he commented, “but I fear Hermione…I may call you that?”

Hermione nodded.

The Dark Lord continued.

“But I fear Hermione, that unless you and Severus can create the elixir for me, neither of you will live to consummate this one-sided little affair,” he said evenly. “Your life depends on this. Do you understand me?”

Hermione nodded. He intended to kill them both if they failed.

“However,” the Dark Lord continued, “If you do manage to recreate the elixir, you will be obliviated and allowed to return to Hogwarts. You will also have the favor of the Dark Lord, although you will have no recollection of it, and be safe from the tribulation that is to come. No deatheater will harm you at the Final Battle or in the New Order that follows. Is that agreeable?”

“Yes,” Hermione said in a small voice, “What about Severus?”

Voldemort looked at her, a slight frown on his face at her audacity at asking him about one of his own. But the witch didn’t know she overstepped her bounds. He let it pass. Normally he would have hit her with an Unforgivable. But she was needed.

“He will continue in service to me,” the Dark Lord replied.

“I see,” Hermione said…then in a fit of boldness she asked him, “Why was he so hurt when he returned?”

The Dark Lord’s red eyes swept over Hermione. She certainly asked a lot of questions. But then again, that was probably how she became Hogwarts’ smartest graduate in the past half-century. You never know unless you ask. It was a bit refreshing really. No one questioned him, and with good reason.

“Severus is my servant, and has certain duties to me. When he performs adequately, he is rewarded. When he performs badly, he is punished. This time, he was punished,” the Dark Lord said, his red eyes on her.

Hermione nodded.

It was a simplistic answer for what she knew was a very complicated situation. She knew for fact that Severus was usually punished no matter what he did. Voldemort was a deviant and took pleasure in causing others pain.

Voldemort took another look into her mind. He saw the erotic images of herself and his servant. They were quite arousing. He wouldn’t mind witnessing them. His expression became rather lustful. Hermione quailed at the intensity of it. But the Dark Lord didn’t share his thoughts.

Instead he asked her, “Have you eaten?”

“No,” Hermione replied.

“For the time being, you are my guest so you will not be locked in your room. Yet I expect you to stay close to the lab and not wander. My deatheaters will not take kindly to you, but they are not allowed in the lab area. Go through that door,” he said pointing a long, scaly finger to a door on his far left, “That is the lab area. There are a number of rooms with beds in them. Select one. I will have food sent to you.”

Hermione stood up and thanked him. She started to walk toward the door.

“Hermione, for both our sakes I hope you are as intelligent and clever as you are claimed to be. If not, you will never see Hogwarts again,” he hissed at her.

Hermione looked at the evil wizard wide-eyed and nodded, then continued on to the lab area.

Voldemort watched her go with mixed emotions. By rights he should kill her. She was a muggle-born and an intruder. Yet if she could help Severus save him, the Dark Lord had to fight his natural inclination and let her live. He needed to do something however.

“Peter!” he called. The fat wizard appeared almost instantly. He walked in front of the throne and bowed.

“Yes, my Lord?” Peter asked him.

Voldemort lazily raised his wand and pointed at the wizard. Peter’s eyes went wide.

“Imperio,” Voldemort said with an evil grin.

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Hermione chose a room that was next to the one Severus was to occupy. She felt better knowing he was close. A very bedraggled house elf brought her a rather tasteless stew, but she ate it all hungrily. It had all the proper ingredients…it just wasn’t seasoned. The Dark Lord didn’t eat, so the quality of the cooking, when there was cooking…was poor for the most part.

Severus joined her a bit later, and via legilimency saw the conversation between herself and the Dark Lord.

“You did well,” he said, looking at her with his dark eyes. They were sitting on Hermione’s bed.

“I had no choice. I had the distinct feeling he would have liked nothing better than to kill me,” she replied, shuddering.

“He would love to kill you. Particularly since you are ‘promised’ to me. He looks for every opportunity to cause me pain,” Severus said.

“If he were to kill me, Severus…would that cause you pain?” she asked him.

Severus looked at her.

“It would cause me some guilt, not pain. It would be your own fault if he did kill you. You had no business following me here,” he replied evenly. “This is why I hold no faith in ‘Love’. It causes people to act stupidly for no logical reason, to make assumptions and take risks that are detrimental to their well-being. You are a fool, Miss Granger, being led around by a naïve heart and your libido.”

Hermione frowned at him.

“If I’m being such a fool, then why didn’t you give me the potion that would have ‘wised’ me up? I wouldn’t have any feelings for you at all if you had did as I asked. And I certainly wouldn’t be here. Voldemort could have cut you into tiny, wriggling pieces and I wouldn’t have cared a bit,” she retorted.

“I didn’t give it to you because I thought it would be a shame for a portion of your mind to be shut down permanently. It would have limited your life experience,” he said, reaching for something other than the obvious reason.

Hermione stared at him in disbelief.

“Am I really supposed to believe that, especially the way you were closing in on me?” she said to him, both of her eyebrows raised. “I couldn’t have kneed you if you weren’t invading my space.’

Severus’ face went black.

“Yes. About that. You could have caused me irreparable damage. If not for the Dark Lord’s summons, you’d have paid for that little stunt in spades,” he snarled at her.

Hermione adjusted herself on the bed and turned to face him.

“Oh really, and what were you going to do? Hex me?” she asked.

He glowered at her.

“No,” he replied in a low growl, “I intended on letting the injured party wreak his revenge.”

“The injured party?” Hermione began, then her eyes dropped to Severus’ loins then back up to Severus’ face. His eyes were hard.

“Let me inform you of something, Miss Granger. You have been pursuing me, and now I am willing to be captured, if only to get my due from you. You have been completely insufferable, retaliatory, smart-mouthed, vindictive and totally disrespectful of my wishes and me. However, you have shown some dark qualities that I appreciate, although I suffered because of them. I didn’t see those qualities in you initially.”

“I am now willing to deflower you, but it isn’t affection for you that drives me. I want you to understand this, and if you have good sense, which you don’t, you will withdraw from me. I just want to see you submit to me totally. Do you understand that? I want to exert power over you in the most intimate, dominating unforgettable way I can. I want to put my mark on you. There is no love, affection or any of the softer, sweeter emotions that women want from men involved. If I take your virginity, Miss Granger, it will be driven by my desire to reduce you to your most primal, uncontrolled state of submission, not because I care about you.”

“I haven’t fucked a woman in years and I have reasons for it. I have let them attend me in other ways, however, ways I find more appropriate due to their nature. I think you need to understand how I view women, Miss Granger. To me, all women are whores. It is in their nature to be so, and I have seen the sweetest witches betray their wizards…in fact I have exposed quite a few. All it takes is for a man to know what to say, and their knickers fall down and their legs go up. Women are a faithless lot.”

“A woman will fuck anyone if he knows how to go about it. I do not trust them, Miss Granger. I will not trust you either. Once you are deflowered, you will fall into the same category as the rest. As of right now, part of your appeal to me is that no other wizard has stuck his cock in you. I won’t be able to be sure of that after the first time. I will not invest my heart in you, ever, despite your claim to love me. I am sure you have the best intentions, but the weakness of your sex will supersede your pureness of heart. Women are born whores and they die whores.”

Hermione looked at the wizard. His jaw was tight and his eyes were hard. Bitterness radiated from him.

“Who hurt you, Severus? Who mauled your heart so badly that you’ve damned a whole world of women to hell?” Hermione asked him softly.

Severus stared at her.

“It’s not a matter of being hurt, it’s a matter of truth, Miss Granger. Women cannot be trusted,” he said with finality, “and if you involve yourself with me, know I will never love you. Ever,” he said, his eyes locked with hers.

“Kindness. What about kindness, Severus? Are you capable of that?” she asked him.

“Not in great amounts. I am not a kind man. I treat people the way I feel they should be treated,” he replied, “and it isn’t reciprocal in nature. Being nice to me is in no way a guarantee I will be nice in return. I am more likely to be cold, no matter how much niceness is piled on me. No one is truly nice. You should know that. Just look at your record the past year,” Severus said, an eyebrow arching.

“You drove me to react the way I did,” Hermione said, “I wasn’t about to let you treat me any kind of way because of how I felt about you.”

“Yes, and you are to be commended for that. Not many witches or wizards have the courage to stand up to me. I have respect for you because you refuse to let me run over you, but that respect would soon fade if you lost your edge because of sexual intimacy, and became a doormat or love-sick little doxy, or a whining, complaining shrew that wanted me to change. I will not change. Just because I give in and fuck you doesn’t mean you will be entitled to special treatment. You won’t be.”

Hermione looked at the Potions Master.

So, if she got involved with him, he would always think she was fucking someone else, wouldn’t love her, would be cold to her, wouldn’t change in any way, shape or form, and would give her no special treatment. He was a real gem, this wizard. It was insane to want anything to do with him.

Still, he was a bitter man. Obviously he had been deeply hurt by a woman. He just wouldn’t admit it. Hermione found it hard to believe that he would not respond to love over time, once he saw it was a true, loyal love. He might mean everything he was saying, but living it was another story. Besides, she didn’t want him to change. She liked him this way. She even liked fighting with him…it did something to her. Of course, she wanted him to treat her well…his actions toward her would go much deeper than his words, which would probably always be caustic.

And as far as what he said about bedding her, and his reasons for doing so…it turned her on. Maybe it shouldn’t have but it did. Being reduced to her most primal, uncontrolled state of submission in his arms was the stuff of her fantasies.

Plus, with Voldemort dead, he wouldn’t be a spy anymore, would not be subjected to the tortures he went through now. That might change his outlook in the future as well. He would be a free man, and might actually seek happiness that he didn’t look for now. The man that he was inside, the one that was selfless, willing to sacrifice himself for others might come out to some extent. And that would be worth her efforts. She looked at the wizard and took a deep breath.

“Severus, I’m still willing to love you despite all you’ve told me,” she said softly.

The Potions Master looked at the witch, his dark eyes searching her face for any sign of doubt or hesitation. He didn’t see any. Severus sighed and shook his head.

“The world is full of fools,” he said to her quietly.

“It’s full of hope too,” she replied.

They sat there together in silence after that, each thinking their own thoughts.

Life would become very interesting, if they survived.

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A/N: I thought Severus needed to lay it on the table in this chapter, and let Hermione know just what to expect from him. The wizard is decidedly bitter against women. Hermione has a lot to handle if she hooks up with him…which we all know she will. Still, the sex sounds as if it will be amazing. Lol. Anyway, please review.

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The Burning Pen

Becoming Familiar with a Man of Misery
by Ruth Solomon

 

The story content is adult in nature and can contain graphic sex and violence. Those under the age of 18 are asked to leave this site immediately. You are not welcome here. The author is not responsible for those under-aged who view these works.

CHAPTER 20

Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to JKR. All situations are mine. No $$$ is being made from this fanfic.
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