Becoming Familiar with a Man of Misery

Chapter 75 ~ A Snafu and a Half

Winston Argyle, employee of the Department of Magical Transportation was sitting in his small office, reading over the latest floo connection requests. They all looked all right, but still had to be run by the Floo Network Authority before the fireplaces could be officially linked into the network. Suddenly a very red-faced wizard rushed into his office.

“Mr. Argyle, we’ve just had a large floo outage that’s affected most of the floos in Little Hangelton. They are all off-line,” the wizard panted.

“Merlin’s balls,” Winston growled slapping his forehead. “All right. Contact the Prophet and the local Wizarding Wireless Network stations and inform them that the floo service in Little Hangelton will be out at least two days, while we look up and verify the current connections and re-establish them. Damn it. I hate when this happens.”

“Yes sir,” the wizard said, disappearing from the doorway.

Floos being down was bad business. Witches and wizards ended up stranded in the worst possible manner and the public always complained. Winston could count on a good dressing down by the Ministry for this, although it wasn’t his fault…and that damned Rita Skeeter would be sniffing around for a story, using her dubious talents as a reporter to make a bad situation infinitely worse. She usually coupled an interview with him with horrible stories of those left stranded, making him appear cold and uncaring. Winston sighed.

He should have taken that job as a Quidditch ref.

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Albus readily granted Severus’ a three-week leave of absence, promising that whatever Professor took up his class would stick to his lesson plan. Severus had heard that one before. When the Potions Master returned to his rooms, he apparated home instead of taking the floo, so he was not aware the network was out in Little Hangelton.

Hermione awoke after Severus left, feeling achy and uncomfortable. It took her a while to get out of bed, and she felt constipated. Eli tried to get her to eat breakfast, but the witch wouldn’t even sit down at the kitchen table. Instead she paced back and forth. Eli watched her closely, his ears flattening.

“Perhaps Mistress would like to sit down,” the elf suggested.

“I don’t want to sit down, Eli! My back hurts!” Hermione hissed at him, rolling about the kitchen scowling, her hand pressed to the small of her back.

Eli was very glad Master kept her wand locked up all the time now. He had a feeling he’d be flying, or flopping or inching around right now if the witch had it in her possession.

“Maybe something to drink, Mistress?” Eli said, noticing Hermione’s lips were chapped.

“NO, I DON’T WANT ANYTHING TO FUCKING DRINK EITHER! LEAVE ME ALONE!” Hermione roared at the elf.

Eli blinked at her helplessly as her breathing began to increase.

“I will call Hogwarts and send for the Master,” the elf said, starting to leave the kitchen.

Hermione hissed and Eli stopped in his tracks, looking at the glowering witch. She was turning quite red.

“No. He can’t do shit but aggravate me,” Hermione snarled, still walking back and forth.

A thunderclap sounded from the living room. Severus had come home.

Hermione rolled her eyes up to the ceiling, leaning back against the counter, the ache in her back becoming stronger. Eli looked at her worriedly, then scampered into the living room to head his Master off.

“Master!” Eli said in a low whisper, “The Mistress is going into labor!”

“What?” Severus said his eyes widening, “Where is she?”

“In the kitchen, but is no good now. We has to wait. Wait for the water,” the elf said.

“The water?” Severus asked looking worried and perplexed.

“First comes water, then comes child,” the elf said.

Severus realized that the elf meant Hermione’s water had to break first.

“Water breaks, then takes her to Hogwarts. Much faster delivery. Less upset for Mistress,” Eli said. “Home is better until then.”

Severus understood. Eli felt Hermione would be less stressed here at home than waiting in the infirmary for her water to break. He didn’t know if he agreed with this, but again, the elf had helped birth him.

They heard Hermione let out a string of curses from the kitchen and a loud crash.

“Is it safe to go in there?” Severus asked the elf.

Eli shook his head.

“No. But you must goes, Master. Mistress needs you,” the elf said, his ears laid back in sympathy.

Severus took a deep breath and strode toward the kitchen. He opened the door and saw Hermione pacing the floor restlessly, her hand pressed to her back, her head down.

“Hermione, I’m here,” he said, standing close to the door.

The witch looked up at him, scowling, her hair wild around her head, and her eyes narrowed. Hermione seemed to bare her teeth at him.

Gods, she looked like she was possessed.

Suddenly the witch bent forward and began to cry.

“Everything hurts, Severus!” she sobbed, “My back, my stomach, my legs…I’m having the baby!”

Severus ran to Hermione and lifted her up in his arms. He didn’t care what Eli said, he was taking his wife to Poppy. She was in too much pain to wait for her water to break. Severus ran with Hermione to the floo and grabbed some powder throwing it into flames.

“Hogwarts Infirmary!” Severus said, ready to step through.

But the fire didn’t turn green. Hermione cried out in his arms. Severus desperately grabbed some more powder and threw it in, repeating his destination. Nothing happened. The floo was out.

“Severus! Oh gods,” Hermione cried, tensing in his arms.

This couldn’t be happening. His wife was in labor and he couldn’t get her to Hogwarts. What was he going to do?

“Don’t worry Hermione, you’ll be all right love,” he said, hugging the sobbing witch to him, “Just hold on, wife. I’ll get you to Poppy.”

The Potions Master thought quickly. Poppy had warned him about the dangers of apparation with a witch in labor. He wasn’t going to take the risk of harming her or his child. He had never splinched, but he wasn’t willing to place Hermione in that kind of danger.

His broom. Maybe he’d be able to fly her to Hogwarts’ Main gate and carry her across the grounds.

Eli came running in with a very small bag.

“The Mistress’ things, Master,” he said putting the bag in Severus’ pocket and looking at Hermione worriedly.

“She needs to go now, can’t wait for water,” Eli said, “Is very close, Master.”

Hermione writhed in Severus’ arms crying out again.

“The floo isn’t working Eli. I need you to come with me. I have to take the broom,” he said, “I’ll need your help to manage her. To help me keep her calm.”

Eli studied the moaning witch.

“Puts her down, Master,” Eli said to Severus.

Severus held on to Hermione for a moment then slowly put her on her feet. She was panting.

“Mistress, look at me, look at Eli,” the elf said softly. Hermione raised her amber eyes and looked into Eli’s wide brown orbs.”

“You must be calm, Mistress. For you and for the child. Eli will help you,” he said softly.

“Please help me, Eli,” Hermione gasped, “please…”

Eli walked up to Hermione and placed one clawed hand under the swell of her belly and one on the small of her back.

“Relax, Mistress. You is going to be fine,” he breathed as his hands began to glow with a soft blue light. Hermione’s panting slowed.

“Catch her, Master,” Eli hissed as Hermione suddenly slumped.

Severus caught Hermione and lifted her back in his arms. He headed toward the back door with her, Eli walking quickly in his wake.

“What did you do to her, Eli?” Severus asked as the elf flicked his finger and opened the door for the wizard.

“Gives her rest. Can only do it once, sir. We must go now,” the elf said, running for the broom shed, opening the door and removing a long cloth wrapped package.

“Eli does not like flying sir, but will go for the Mistress,” the elf said as he laid the package down and unrolled it, revealing Severus’ broom.

As soon as it was released, the Firebolt levitated in front of the Potions Master, it’s ash handle gleaming brightly in the sunlight. Eli maintained it carefully, and Severus was very grateful that he did. The wizard carefully mounted the broom, placing Hermione in front of him, sidesaddle. Eli, climbed on facing backward towards the witch, moving in closely. Severus’s long arms reached around both of them gripping the broom handle securely.

“Prepare yourself, Eli,” Severus said kicking off and accelerating quickly, his black hair streaming as they streaked through the sky, the broom reaching one hundred and fifty miles an hour in ten seconds.

The Firebolt was a quality broom made with pinpoint precision, unsurpassable balance and an unbreakable braking charm. Severus was a skilled flyer and tore through the sky, his hair streaming as he flew for Hogwarts. Unfortunately he would not be able to enter the airspace over the castle, and would have to enter through the main gate. They would be there before long.

Eli kept his wide brown eyes on Hermione as the wind whistled by them, watching for any sign of her waking…but the witch remained quiet, her eyes closed. He had placed a powerful relaxation spell on her, but could not do it again because of her condition. Poppy had better spells to take away her pain while leaving her lucid and awake. Severus looked down at his wife from time to time as they flew. She just had to hold on. They should have made a contingency plan…but they never imagined the floo network would go down.

As they flew, Severus thought about an odd law he had once heard existed in the muggle world. Mumphrey’s Law or something like it that stated the worst possible thing would happen at the worst possible time. That law must have leaked into the wizarding world somehow. He had never seen this coming.

Below, the familiar layout of Hogwarts came into view and Severus eased into a quick descent, landing directly in front of the gate. He quickly dismounted with Hermione and Eli miniaturized the Firebolt, slipping it into his Master’s pocket as he unwarded the gate and pushed it open, taking off at a desperate run across the grounds. He could feel Hermione beginning to stir.

Eli winked out and reappeared in the Infirmary. He could do this because house elves didn’t apparate. They just “goes”.

“Madame Pomfrey! Madame Pomfrey! Master and Mistress come!” the elf squeaked loudly, running through the wing in search of the medi-witch. Poppy hurried out of her office. She recognized Severus’ servant.

The medi-witch looked toward the floo.

“Where are they?” she asked the elf.

“The floo did not work. Master carried Mistress on his Firebolt,” the elf said, his ears flattened.

“They came by broom? Of all the crazy ways to…is Severus mad?” she griped, wiping her hands on her apron and pulling back a privacy curtain, preparing a cot for the witch.

Eli scowled.

“Master did what was best!” the elf declared, his ears pressed forward aggressively, his small arms folded against his chest. “There was no floo!”

Poppy looked at the elf.

“Calm down, Eli or I’ll give you a draught,” she threatened, then pulled back the covers on the bed.

The medi-witch walked to her linen closet, removed a stack of fluffy white towels and walked back to the enclosure and placed them on the small table next to the bed. She pulled out her wand and flicked it at both side of the end of the bed. Stirrups appeared. Eli watched her closely.

Poppy looked at the elf.

“Make yourself useful, Eli…go get some extra pillows off the other beds.

Eli was happy to have something to do, and quickly did as the medi-witch asked.

There was a loud “foomph” and Severus stepped through the infirmary floo, walking swiftly as Hermione groaned in his arms.

“Bring her here, Severus,” Poppy called to him.

The Potions Master picked up the pace and reached the cot, laying Hermione gently against the pillows Eli had piled up, so she was in a half raised position. Suddenly Hermione’s water broke, her robes and the bed soaked with pinkish liquid. Her belly seemed to deflate.

“Oh my,” Poppy said, scourgifying the bed quickly and divestoing Hermione’s robes so she lay there naked for a moment, before being clothed in a loose-fitting white gown.

“Severus!” Hermione cried out as pain washed over her. The Potions Master ran to her side and knelt, holding her hand.

“I’m here, Hermione,” he said, then turned to Poppy.

“Can’t you do something? I thought witches didn’t have to go through this,” he snapped at the medi-witch, worry for his wife and child taking away any politeness he might have addressed her with. “She might as well be at a muggle hospital!”

Poppy walked up to the bed, scowling.

“You just got her here, Severus. Give me a moment,” she said to him, frowning as she pulled out her wand. She muttered a spell and the tip turned blue. She passed it over Hermione’s belly and the witch sighed with relief. The pain was gone, though she did feel some pressure.

“There you go, Hermione,” Poppy said, giving Severus another glare.

“Thank you, Poppy,” Hermione said, her eyes shifting to her worried husband’s face. “There’s no pain now, Severus. Stop worrying.”

That was easier said than done. Severus continued to hold her hand, his black eyes searching her face for any sign of anything untoward. Hermione caressed his face, he looked so wound up.

“We’re both going to be fine,” she said as Pomfrey placed her feet in the stirrups and knelt, examining her. Hermione gasped as the medi-witch slipped two gloved fingers inside her and pressed down on her belly.

“I can feel the crown. It won’t be long now,” Poppy said, withdrawing her fingers and removing the gloves. “You’ll feel an increase in pressure. When you feel as if you want to have a bowel movement, Hermione let me know. That will be your time to begin pushing.”

Hermione nodded. Poppy looked at Severus.

“Come with me, Severus…you have some paperwork to fill out,” she said to the wizard. Severus continued to kneel beside the bed, holding Hermione’s hand tightly. Poppy put her hands on her hips.

“Hermione isn’t going anywhere, Severus. She will be right here when you return,” Poppy said.

Severus scowled at the medi-witch stubbornly.

“Severus, don’t be difficult. Do as Poppy says,” Hermione said to him, moved that her husband did not want to leave her side.

It was hard to believe this was the same wizard who threatened to hex her when she confessed her love. The same wizard who claimed he would never, ever love her.

“Very well,” Severus said darkly, rising. “Let’s make this quick, Poppy.”

He followed the medi-witch, looking back at Hermione.

“I’ll be right back,” he said.

“I’ll be right here,” Hermione replied, her feet up in the stirrups and her legs gapped open to the world.

Hell, where was she going to go?

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A/N: Baby time! Please review.

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The Burning Pen

Becoming Familiar with a Man of Misery
by Ruth Solomon

 

The story content is adult in nature and can contain graphic sex and violence. Those under the age of 18 are asked to leave this site immediately. You are not welcome here. The author is not responsible for those under-aged who view these works.

CHAPTER 76

Disclaimer: All recognizable characters belong to JKR. All situations are mine. No $$$ is being made from this fanfic.
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